Both not happy in relationship and pregnant

Relationships problems and pregnancy | Tommy’s

both not happy in relationship and pregnant

I just don't feel it's fair to bring a child into an unhappy relationship, and I'm scared I would regret the abortion, and that I might not be able to get pregnant again in the future. Both options sound scary in different ways. Pregnant women in strained relationships with their partners may be Study Suggests Pregnant Women in Unhappy Relationships May Be at. However much you are both looking forward to having a baby, it is quite or not you were pregnant - you can't blame everything on pregnancy!.

You will get clingy The pregnancy hormones surging through your body can have a profound impact on your emotions, triggering your feelings of panic. Don't worry -- this crazy woman will recede back into her primal cave as your pregnancy progresses. In the mean time, it's a good idea to warn your partner. Let him know you're feeling especially needy right now, and that it would really help for him to give you extra hugs and attention.

You might not be on the same page The minute you see that extra line on the plastic stick, you feel like a mom. And your body gives you little signs to confirm your newly appointed status. Your partner doesn't have any of those physical symptoms -- and until science catches up with science fiction, he never will.

Relationships problems and pregnancy

Which means he may not feel like he's a father until he holds that bundle of joy for the first time. Try not to feel upset if he doesn't seem concerned about picking out nursery paint or looking at booties. He might feel left out Again, everything is happening to you. Aside from a couple of congratulatory back slaps or a handful or cigars tossed his way, most of the excitement about the pregnancy revolves around you.

And since he can't exactly help you grow that thing, he might not feel so connected to it -- or to you, at times. Encouraging him to bond with the bump will help him feel more integral to the pregnancy. Be sure to set aside non-baby time, too. I know you'd hoped he would look after you, rather than the other way around, but hey I'm going to be talking about 'he', but I do appreciate your partner could also be a woman.

If so, please forgive me the unfortunate short-cut. By the way, you can substitute "he" for "she" if you are in a lesbian relationship or marriage. Recently discovered you're pregnant? If you're unexpectedly pregnant - it may just be a shock to your partner and perhaps he only needs time to process the news.

He might need a little longer to adjust to the changing reality than you had in mind, but that's perfectly okay. Is there any chance that you've become over-anxious because you've jumped to conclusions?

Love and Pregnancy: 5 Ways Pregnancy Will Change Your Relationship

Maybe his mood changed, and you started to worry? There may be no problem at all. He could just need some time to get used to the idea. You might discover that he really does love you, and that all will be well. If the surprise is not the reason for his withdrawal, then read on Particularly when you're pregnant, you need your partner or someone else to be interested and supportive!

both not happy in relationship and pregnant

What were the circumstances when you fell pregnant? The timing of your pregnancy will have had an impact on both of you, but perhaps particularly your partner. It may be a problem in itself, or a contributing factor: I know it sounds horrible, but we may as well be honest with each other.

Love and Pregnancy: 5 Ways Pregnancy Will Change Your Relationship

All of the above complicate the situation, so just keep this in mind when you consider how best to repair and heal your relationship or marriage. Your problem is never too small, too big, too silly, too complicated or too embarrassing to discuss with an expert couples counsellor - in confidence. Make use of the opportunity to connect with a professional to get expert relationship help now I may earn a commission from Better Help.

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You pay the same fee, regardless. Chances are you're both stressed out.

both not happy in relationship and pregnant

So, I'm really hoping that this article will help the two of you calm down and look forward to the birth of the baby with less angst. I'm also going to assume that an abortion is not an option for you - and that is material for another article.

If your partner has truly left you, then my breakup articles will be the best help for you right now. So, why might your partner be unhappy? Maybe you never really discussed it. Or if you did, you may have thought he would change.

Perhaps you thought he would be delighted the moment he knew you were pregnant. Maybe he felt you've left him with no choice. Why might he be behaving in such a 'selfish' way?

He's fearful of the responsibility of having a child or another one. He's worried about finances: He's already self-conscious and is worried about being shown up in public as a failing dad. He had a difficult childhood himself and doesn't want to risk putting his own children through a similar situation. He suffers from mental health problems and fears that he may pass that on to the child.

He is fearful about passing on a genetic condition common in his family. He suffers from obsessive compulsive disorder and can't cope with the additional stress of having a child disrupt his routines and rituals. He fears having to compete with the child for your attention.

He may be worried that he knows zilch about pregnancy, if this is his first baby.

both not happy in relationship and pregnant

He may think he should know, and worries about being 'found out'. He may be completely at a loss about his role as a dad if this is his first child, particularly if he has grown up without a father, The pregnancy is ill-timed in his mind for whatever reason: He may be miffed about a lack of sex and intimacy.

He may translate your preoccupation with the baby as you not loving him as much as you did before. Or he may remember from a previous pregnancy how you seemed in his mind to be in a world of your own with little attention for him.

You may be over the moon, but he may feel a failure. Perhaps he had plans to end the relationship. Or maybe he is having an affair. He feels ill-prepared for taking on increased responsibility for your other children. He may have experienced your previous pregnancies and births as difficult, based on what you went through - whether that was a traumatic birth, post-natal depression or any other kind of problem.

both not happy in relationship and pregnant

He's having an affair. A combination of any of the above. Now that I've given you a start, you may have some thoughts of your own about what the problem is and why he's being so off with you. Once you can understand the root of the problem, you can both take steps to address it.

Stressed by your husband? I can so understand that you feel alone and frightened about the future and depressed about your relationship. It's natural that you're now worried that you're going to be all by yourself; that giving birth is going to be tinged with sadness.