ISTJ Relationships | 16Personalities
Understanding how an ISTJ thinks is the stepping stone to connecting with them Love Life Advice Do you want to learn more about a current relationship?. Often representing the epitome of family values, people with the ISTJ personality type are ISTJs approach relationships, as with most things, from a rational. ISTJs and faithful and stable in all their relationships. Honesty is a strength for an ISTJ, but it can also be a weakness. ISTJs won't lie and they won't mince words.
I fell for a logic seeking, fact-oriented, judging introvert. I, however, will be looking at cool spots for lunch and ensuring we brought snacks and music for the journey.
Appreciate Your Strengths While there are moments of teeth-gritting and acceptance, perhaps the greatest strategy for living happily with your personality opposite is to appreciate and embrace your differences. I brought the unit home and immediately put it together. It took five minutes. I was pretty proud of myself until I plugged it in. About that time, my husband came home to find the vacuum cleaner surrounded by an array of bolts, screws and thingamajigs.
We try to segregate responsibilities, not by gender or role, but by who is better at doing it. I know there are things I excel at, entertaining, nurturing friendships, remembering birthdays, and things that are in his wheel house. We focus more on what the other party brings to the table and less on what they do not. Avoid Criticism As much as possible, we try emphasis on the word 'try' not to criticize one another.
Early on, my mate watched me rehearse a speech I was giving for a large audience later that day. He felt compelled to share with me his honest evaluation, which was that I was too animated, my voice was too loud, and I flailed my arms. Which leads us to our next tip: They place great importance on honesty and integrity.
They are "good citizens" who can be depended on to do the right thing for their families and communities. While they generally take things very seriously, they also usually have an offbeat sense of humor and can be a lot of fun - especially at family or work-related gatherings.
ISTJs tend to believe in laws and traditions, and expect the same from others. They're not comfortable with breaking laws or going against the rules. If they are able to see a good reason for stepping outside of the established mode of doing things, the ISTJ will support that effort.
Opposites Attract: The True Story of an ENFP Married (Happily!) to an ISTJ
However, ISTJs more often tend to believe that things should be done according to procedures and plans. If an ISTJ has not developed their Intuitive side sufficiently, they may become overly obsessed with structure, and insist on doing everything "by the book". The ISTJ is extremely dependable on following through with things which he or she has promised. For this reason, they sometimes get more and more work piled on them. Because the ISTJ has such a strong sense of duty, they may have a difficult time saying "no" when they are given more work than they can reasonably handle.
For this reason, the ISTJ often works long hours, and may be unwittingly taken advantage of. The ISTJ will work for long periods of time and put tremendous amounts of energy into doing any task which they see as important to fulfilling a goal. However, they will resist putting energy into things which don't make sense to them, or for which they can't see a practical application.
They prefer to work alone, but work well in teams when the situation demands it. They like to be accountable for their actions, and enjoy being in positions of authority. The ISTJ has little use for theory or abstract thinking, unless the practical application is clear.
Originally Posted by Jasette I will say, a lot of what you guys have been saying is what NOT to do, even when put in a positive way like be patient, loyal, etc - really means don't be be opposite of those things, haha. What are some more positive actions I could possibly implement?
So, no matter what advice you receive, you can turn it around and make it into a negative. If I say "be loving" you can turn it around and say, "don't be unloving. If you choose to view it as "don't be impatient" or "don't be unloyal" then there's not much we can do about that. Originally Posted by Jasette I'm also a little curious if you have any input on the physical side of our relationship. I feel like we're moving a little slowly. I'm not sure if that's because I have no experience like none - the is the first relationship I've ever been in, at age 21and he's being patient and taking it slow for me