Learning to Let Go of Past Hurts: 5 Ways to Move On
Getting over an ex has a lot more to do with knowing who you are and the story you tell yourself about your past relationship than it does with. A good strategy for getting past these moments is to simply write down every painful thing you can remember happening during the relationship and read it over. If a past relationship of yours ended on a bad note then you might notice idea to learn how to move past it so that it no longer weighs you down. the way we behave in future relationships if we don't get rid of it," life coach.
The person we are targeting is gone, but still we keep the blaze going at our own emotional expense. Maybe at first you felt righteous about it, like the anger was helping you move forward.
How to let go. Discover the power of releasing the past.
Once you decide to commit yourself toward letting go of a relationship and moving on, you may discover other moments that you can afford to move on from as well. Regardless of who initiated the breakup or the reason behind the split, you need to move on. Instead, work on learning how to forgive yourself for getting so caught up in the drama of your personal life and allowing your anger and resentment to hurt you and hold you back.
Letting go is not as hard as it may seem. Bad things happen, sure, but you cannot change the past, so why continue to perpetuate it? When you think of the person more often than not. When you still have questions and resignations about the past.
When you often bring up the person in your conversations, even when there is no relation. When you find yourself living out the same looping patterns. A very common example would be on-again, off-again relationships with that person. Even if you are with other people, if the relationships act out in the same pattern as the past, it reflects you have not moved on.
Getting over a breakup – how to let go and move on
Moving On Takes Time The moving on process will take time, probably longer than you might think. There were many times when I came to a new revelation and thought I had thus moved on, only to realize afterward there was more inner baggage to be cleared. In these 4 years, there was a truckload of baggage cleared. To be honest, it really shocked me to know the amount of baggage that was stored inside me all this while, despite actively living consciously.
Two, to have so much baggage created from a relatively short period of time we first parted ways 1. No more mental torture or mental inhibitions. No more holding yourself back for something that cannot come to pass. Depending on how deep the emotional impact was, it might take several phases before you can really move on. Whatever you do, you will definitely be making progress every step along the way.
10 Steps to Move On From a Relationship | Personal Excellence
Be it bitter or sweet, each time you are clearing baggage, bit by bit. Each step is an act of healing in itself.
Acknowledge, accept and let go of your feelings With every broken relationship comes baggage. The length of time me and G were in close, active communication was about 2.
Not very long compared to others, yet there was so much baggage to be cleared in my head! If your relationship was longer, I can imagine there must be a lot more for you to deal with. Our baggage will be a mixture of sadness, regret, hope, wistfulness, melancholy, disappointment. If the relationship was intense, your baggage will probably include hate, grief, anger, fear, shame and other deeper emotions.
Whatever the emotion is, open yourself to the emotion fully. This means if you hate the person, feel that hatred. If you feel sad, soak in your sadness. If you feel the need to grief, then please grief.
Cry if need be.
Take time out for yourself to process these feelings. Embrace them and accept them. To complete the cleansing process, all the dirt has to be cleansed. To do so you need to first acknowledge and accept your feelings. As you connect with these emotions, slowly let them go. Feel them, understand the source, then release them.
Some suggestions would be to talk to a good friend, journaling or meditation. Such fixations are dangerous. I always believe if real intention is there, any obstacles, no matter how insurmountable, can be overcome. Your friends are there for a reason, to help you, support you, and pull you through this period. Other close friends include my secondary school pals, my junior college friend, my god brother whom I knew back when I was 15 and my best friend from university.
These people were there to listen to me and support me when I was down. Think about the things that caused arguments — not just who caused them. And, crucially, try to understand your part in what happened. Although the answers to these might be upsetting, they will make it easier to let go of the past and avoid making the same mistakes in the future.
Embrace your freedom Coming to terms with the end of a relationship is a very freeing experience. As you enter this new stage, you may find the following tips useful: Look for ways to find a lasting sense of personal happiness.
Consider trying out things that would enrich you as a person like a new hobby, or helping others. Learning to maintain good self-esteem is an important part of creating a positive future.