36 Deep Questions to Ask Your Significant Other | Science of People
Jun 22, 22 Questions To Ask Your Partner To Take Your Relationship To The Next If you won the lottery, what would you do with the money? Feb 11, But when you're building a relationship or trying to become close with someone you're dating, asking the right relationship questions can make. Researcher Arthur Aron developed 36 questions to ask your significant other and Social psychology researcher Arthur Aron of the Interpersonal Relationships.
When you and your partner complement each other in terms of what you each want to give and get, having a loving, healthy relationship will be pretty seamless. If you have different needs, then you might need to work a little harder to each person is satisfied. Either way, this is a great question to gain an understanding of how he views relationships.
Do you believe everything happens for a reason, or do we just find reasons after things happen? Most people are divided into two categories, the ones that thing everything is destiny and the ones that think life is a series of random occurrences.
This thought provoking question will give you insight into where he stands and is sure to rouse some very interesting conversation. Is there anything you consider absolutely unforgivable? Some people can forgive anything, others are pretty tough and may have a low threshold for certain behaviors.
If you woke up tomorrow with no fear, what would you do first? In your life, what has been the biggest blessing in disguise? If you could pick one year of your life to do-over, which would it be and why? People can interpret this question in different ways. Some might want to re-live a year that was really fun and amazing and others might want a re-do of a year where they made significant mistakes. What is one behavior that you never tolerate?
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Does spending time with other people energize you or drain you? People assume extroverts are fun and friendly and chatty while introverts are shy, withdrawn, and quiet. Extroverts usually feel energized by being around people while introverts need time alone in order to re-charge. If you could write a note to your younger self, what would you say in only three words? It also has the potential to talk a bit about your childhoods, which is a really significant way to get to know someone since so much of who we are was shaped in our early years.
What's your favorite viral YouTube video? What is the last book you read?
Fun Questions To Ask Your Significant Other — Society Letters
What was your favorite color or Crayola crayon growing up? What word do you hope people use to describe you after you die? If it were possible, would you live on the moon? If you could break any world record which one would it be? Who would you hate to see naked?
50 Deep Questions To Ask Your Boyfriend Tonight That Will Immediately Bring You Two Closer
If you could got back in time 1, years, what year would you visit? Would you let me slap you for a hundred dollars? What famous historical figure would like to fight?
What's the weirdest dream you've ever had? If you could master one musical instrument, what would it be? What's your least favorite fast food restaurant? If someone wrote a biography about you, what do you think the title should be? Have you ever been drunk in public?
What do you think phones will be like in 10 years? What bad habit do you have that you know you need to break, but don't really want to? If you were president for the day, what one thing would you change about the country?
How would you describe yourself in three words? If money were no object, where in the world would you choose to live? If you had to eat one thing from McDonald's, every meal for a week straight, what would you chose? Describe your own personal hell.
Describe your own personal heaven. If you could deliver a speech to the entire world, what would you say? Have you ever chased down an ice cream truck as an adult? What is the weirdest scar you have and how did you get it? If you had to choose to live without one of your five senses, which one would you give up?
Have you ever saved someone's life? If you found out you were the direct descendant of a king or queen, would you go find them and claim your throne or keep your life as it was? Has anyone ever saved your life? What skills do you posses that could help you survive the zombie apocalypse? If you inherited a single room off-the-grid cabin in the woods, would you be excited or disappointed?
Level 2 can happen naturally as you live with someone, travel with someone and have shared experiences. But Level 3 only can be done purposefully—with the right questions in a safe space. This brings me to the 36 couple questions.
Social psychology researcher Arthur Aron of the Interpersonal Relationships Lab at Stony Brook University in New York developed 36 questions to help people break through each of the intimacy levels. You can do these with your partner or with friends. I highly recommend them to parents and teens.
Vulnerability brings people closer. The point of these questions is to have sustained, escalating and reciprocal self-disclosure. Take time having both people answer the questions and truly listen to the answers without judgment. There is no such thing as rapid intimacy.